Skinny shaming -- not okay

7:47 PM

So I came across this photo today...

It's definitely nothing new. I've seen these "real women have curves" images all over the place. And you'd think that, being in huge support of having a healthy relationship with food, I would love this message. 

I don't. 

First of all, the above photo features seven different women -- all seven of them are real. Believe it or not, real women have curves, or don't; they wear size 0 or they don't; they have eating disorders or they don't; they have a coveted thigh gap or they don't. Every woman is different but it doesn't make one less real than the other. Granted many of the thin models we see in magazines have been air brushed to all heck but I'd be surprised if the "normal size" women above weren't. Look at their perfectly done hair and makeup. Should we start a movement that "real women have uneven winged eyeliner"? (We mostly do, by the way.) 

Real women don't have white teeth?

Real women can't put hair extensions in very well?

Real women don't always match their bra to their underwear?

We are all real so let's get over that. If the message is that "normal" women do, sure. On "average" we are slightly over weight as per Health Canada's recommendations. I don't see why that's something to promote. "Let's be as close to normal as possible!" 

Next, how is it a wholesome, inspirational message to outright say that one group is hotter than the other? We are inclined to feel good about this statement because we are rooting for the underdog. The below Vic-Secret-type women are likely often found attractive so when we see the bigger women being preferred we love it. Guess what? It's rude no matter how much privilege the group has. Racism has long seen major privilege for white people, does this mean a poster stating "Blacks are smarter!" is in good taste? Nope. Placing your judgment on someone based on their body appearance and then publicizing it on the internet is mean and unnecessary. Were it the other way around (flip the photos) it would be seen as rude and horrible. 

We also need to remember that sometimes being bigger is unhealthy. If a woman is big but healthy - awesome - but if it's causing her issues with her heart health and/or blood sugar, let's not glorify that. I know that thinness and health are not synonymous but when we drive home the point that "fat is okay" it can create a complacency for people to not desire to get healthy. 

Lastly, the skinny shaming needs to end because not all skinny people intend to be that way. Now I'm not saying I'm even in the realm of thinness as these bikini-wearing women but I've certainly been the victim of skinny shaming. 

Go eat something. Give her the last cookie she needs it. Oh my pants would hang on you. You don't even need to work out.       These are just the beginning. And I'm a "normal" weight by my Body Mass Index. 

Skinny shamers only think they are building up bigger women but really they are bringing down thin women at the same time. It's hurtful. Some skinny women work hard to be that way, some are that way naturally and don't care, and still others hate being thin so much that they so everything they can to gain weight and it doesn't work. 

It is never your job to judge how someone looks and then make them feel badly about it. 

When my son turned 1 I was nursing him a lot and it caused me some weight loss. This drove me crazy mainly because I wanted to be fertile again soon but also because my clothes didn't fit. I did EVERYTHING to put on weight. I would drink a smoothie filled with protein powder, coconut oil & half and half cream almost daily. I put in extreme effort to not drop below 115 lbs. Sometimes putting on weight isn't an option. Sit back and think; if this was the case for you, how would you feel about a photo that says other women are hotter than you? Gladly that period of my life didn't last long but now I can sympathize. 

Oh, and, girls? From what I see above these are women. 

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